UNDERSTANDING HUMAN BODY LANGUAGE FOR EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION

Is she interested? If you want to meet women I suggest you first make sure you have mastered your body language and learned the ability to interpret a woman's body language. Before any conversation takes place, a woman has already formed an opinion of you. Body language is a subtle, subconscious language that tells people reams about you. When it comes to your own body language, the first thing to work on is your posture. Good posture immediately conveys confidence and self esteem. Pay attention to your body and what it is doing. Ask a friend to tell you when you are doing a nervous habit so you can learn to stop it. Make sure you make eye contact with everyone you speak to. There are many books about body language and I suggest you pick one up and study it, take notes and memorize what it says. In my favorite book of this genre, The Definitive Book of Body Language by Allan and Barbara Pease, I learned some ways to tell a woman is interested. According to this book there are subtle signals and gestures a woman has to show she is interested. Here are a few of them: Tossing or flipping her hair is one of the first signs a woman gives that she is interested. The woman will toss or flip her hair off her shoulders or away from the face and even women with short hair do this. An open, pouting mouth and wet lips -- This is a primitive sign that she is interested in you. Touching herself -- if she is touching her legs, throat or neck this could be a sign she is interested. In addition, if she has a limp wrist, this expresses interest. Fondling something cylindrical something like a cigarette, stem of a wineglass, a finger, a straw, is a sign that she views you as more than just a friend. Exposing the underside of her wrists and palms Doing this is a subconscious sign of interest. A sideways glance this is usually done over a raised shoulder. Typically when a woman is expressing interest in you the gaze is only held for a few seconds before she looks away. Rolling hips when walking this is a primitive signal emphasizing the difference between the genders. Women have childbearing hips, something primitive men looked for in a partner. A tilted pelvis again another primitive signal showing she is capable of child bearing. As you see, many of these are instinctive signals women and men send back and forth without the conscious mind even realizing it. Most of them developed in order to keep the human species alive. Handbag location if a woman keeps or moves her handbag close to the man this is a sign she is attracted because it is almost an extension of her body. She may even caress the bag or ask him to pass it to her, a sign of intimacy. Knee direction if one leg is tucked under, the knee may point to a man she is interested in. Shoe Dangle her shoe off her toes or putting a foot in and out of the shoe. Twining the legs When a woman has one thigh pressed tightly on the other, it makes the legs look more attractive but is also an indicator of interest. In addition, crossing and uncrossing legs is another sign. As mentioned above, a lot of these signals -- obviously not all -- are primitive ones that may have even been developed before speech to show interest in another person. It can save you a lot of time and energy to be aware of them. Good luck.

UNDERSTANDING HUMAN BODY LANGUAGE FOR EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION

In a series of articles, we shall look in the true meaning of body language and their relative importance when engaged in discussion for effective communication. There is no mistaking a distinct signal that comes from deliberate body language. Body language speaks the truth and sends an unmistakable message without the need to utter any comment. From the day we are born body language plays a significant factor in communicating our most basic requirements. A one month old baby instinctively knows that the way to its Mothers heart is through her eyes. The baby also knows that when it is hungry, crying is used as communicating this message. While we can control our body language to a fair degree, one thing we can't control is our pupils - yes, one of the most subtle signs that someone is attracted to you is in the eyes. Nancy Fagin writes on the BBW Magazine website: "One of the obvious signs of physiological attraction is enlarged pupils. There are two main factors that cause our pupils to dilate, attraction and dim light. To confirm whether you think someone's eyes are dilating, try and do some subtle comparisons with others in the same room." Before all the modern day conveniences of communicating such as social networking, Twitter and online dating sites, real time face to face forms of expressions were all we knew. 30 years ago, the most common way to determine mutual attraction was partly due to body language, nowadays, dating and meeting new people has become all too easy thanks to technology. Body language certainly goes beyond the eyes for you to be able determine attraction. Who would have ever thought that feet would play such a role in the land of love and romance! Feet stare too so if the person you are talking to is standing with their feet aiming at you, they have you well and truly in their sights. Regardless of the body part, every part of our body will subconsciously send out a signal that will often determine whether we are attracted to someone or not. If something points at another person, whether it be our legs or feet, there is a certain level of interest being assessed. While body language comes in subtle variations, there are also obvious signs that cannot be mistaken. If you are trying to send a distinct message to someone but you're not quite ready to come out and say it, try talking to them facing your whole body towards them with your shoulders lining the other person up. If you notice they are reciprocating the body language then it's as good as them telling you out loud "c'mon, hurry up and ask me out." When someone feels compelled to subconsciously copy our body language it's a sure bet that they are feeling very comfortable around you and do in fact like you. This tell tale sign of mirroring someone can be used as a positive signal both in romance and in the business world. Touch is another big cue. If the person finds any excuse to touch you (like removing a bit of lint from your clothing) this is a sign that they're keen. Touch is used by singles in the flirting stakes to communicate interest. So learn to read the signs...from top to toe, our bodies always tell the truth.

TURN YOUR NEGATIVITY TO POSITIVITY

Many people find that clearing their mind can be a real challenge. This is understandable if we consider that the mind hates to be idle and will always find something to think about. That is the main reason why clearing your mind of one kind of thought, such as negative ones, requires that you fill your brain with another kind of thought, like positive ones.

Many times if you are having negative thoughts, you begin to feel negative, then it becomes harder to change the kind of thoughts you have because the negative thoughts are actually giving you a negative attitude. What happens as the negative feelings grow is that you become absorbed in feeling negative, soon as your attitude changes, your mind becomes filled with sad or depressing thoughts. It is a back and forth situation because your mind is in tune with your feelings and your feelings affect your thoughts. But, because of this close connection between your mind and your feelings, you can focus on controlling your thoughts which in turn makes it possible to change your feelings with your thoughts.

When it comes to clearing your mind of negative thoughts, first thing it requires is that you to change your feelings and that means a change in attitude. You can get this process started by thinking about those times in your life when you were happy. You can also think of people who make you happy, things that make you happy, like a big screen TV, or a terrific purse that goes with everything. As you begin to think of these pleasant things you will find a wonderful thing will begin to happen, you will notice your mind starting to fill with more pleasant thoughts.

As you get more and more into the pleasant thoughts you are thinking, you will find that your mind starts filling with pleasant thoughts almost automatically, while pushing all those negative thoughts out of your mind. The more pleasant thoughts you think the less room there is for negative thoughts. The more pleasant thoughts you experience also means the more your feelings will change and become more positive. Once you are consumed by positive feelings it becomes difficult to even think about negative thoughts.

Another nice side effect to developing a positive attitude is that others usually notice the change in attitude and join in with positive thoughts of their own. The only thing that can cause concern in this method is the length of time you have been experiencing negative thoughts. If you have been filled with negative thoughts for some time they start to seem normal. In fact the negative thoughts become even comforting. That means you will feel uncomfortable trying to think positive so much that you will continue to think negative thoughts from time to time. But you must fight off the temptation to think negative and revert to what feels comfortable.

Try to find others who can also thing positive thoughts to keep you working on positive thoughts as much as possible. Once you get used to thinking positive thoughts it becomes easier. You just need to get past feeling uncomfortable with positive thoughts initially. The positive thoughts you must force yourself to think will seem unnatural, possibly even silly. But that;s because you are more comfortable with those negative thoughts you think all the time. Accept that they feel uncomfortable but keep working to have as many positive thoughts as you can.

There may be setbacks. When things go wrong, that is when it is the hardest to keep those positive thoughts. But if you can get yourself thinking positive thoughts, even when small things go wrong you will eventually find that you have fewer and fewer negative thoughts. It does take work, it does feel unnatural at first, it can even feel silly. But the benefits will make it all worth while in the end. The only thing keeping negative thoughts in your head is you. It is simply the fact that you feel more comfortable thinking those negative thoughts.

It's kind of like starting a new path, it's hard, you have to hold down the blades of grass at first but eventually the path becomes easy to see and it's harder to take a different path.

FEAR MISTAKES AND ACHIEVE LESS

One fundamental reason for people not to do something new is a fear to make a mistake. If one made a mistake, he would be embarrassed. He would consider his friends laughing at him. His boss would reprimand him for his mistake. Making a mistake would be embarrassing on top of all these. Please take a moment to think about these factors, which made him afraid. These were things that he imagined. These were things that had not happened yet. These all might not happen. One may not make a mistake doing something new and different. His supervisor may admire him trying something new, instead of being angry.

One has no way knowing what will happen in the future, as long as he is not a psychic. If one was busy enough to take care of things happening today, he should not worry too much about tomorrow. Tomorrow is another day. He may be glad he did it tomorrow. The first suggestion for not being afraid of doing something is to think positively. Do not imagine anything negative may occur.

The second noteworthy suggestion is that one should know that making mistakes is just a learning process. According to a reliable source, a human being cannot learn something without making mistakes. Especially, one is learning something complicated, such as selling process, marketing process, engineering studies, computer usage, or foreign languages. If one recognized making mistakes as a learning process, it would not be so hard to make a mistake. One can tell himself that it is reasonable to make a mistake, since he is in the learning process. He could be even willing to make mistakes, since he would be one step closer to mastering it.

It is especially true in learning languages. It is impossible to master foreign or second language without making mistakes. If one did not want to make any mistake in learning a language, only way for him is not to use the language. If one does not use the language, he cannot master the language. Remember children make a lot of mistakes, but as a result of their mistakes, they gradually develop their speaking and writing skills. In a language school, the ones who acquire language skills are to be 5 - 10% of students, they say. These 5 - 10% students are the ones who sit in the front row of their classroom and intervene the lesson by asking questions in the language they are learning. They are the ones who gain the language skills.

APPRECIATE PEOPLE AROUND YOU

Do you wake up in the morning feeling as though something is missing from your life? Do you find yourself thinking that life just hasn't turned out the way you expected? Do you keep looking for that illusive something that will make you happy? Do you look around you and feel as though there should be something more to life? If so then you are not alone. You are one of the millions of people who feel unfulfilled or mild depression. The good news is that you can change all that starting today. It will take some effort, but you can lead a happier and more fulfilled life starting right now. In fact, you have already begun by taking the time to read this article. You are admitting to yourself that you want to live a happier and more fulfilled life and are willing to make the changes that are necessary to achieve that goal. It starts by learning to be grateful for what you do have. For those talents and abilities that you have been given or worked hard to achieve, for those people in your life who care about you, for your health, and for all those little things that you have been taking for granted. What do you have to be grateful for? You are probably asking yourself what do you have to be grateful for. You might even be thinking such thoughts as "I don't have the job I really want." or "I can't even afford a vacation" These things may even be true but, by focusing on all the things you don't have you are overlooking what you do have and that is a big part of why you feel the way you do. You need to change your focus and start looking at what is good in your life. Start by making a list, as silly as this sounds it really does help and you will be surprised at how many things you have that you can be grateful for. When making your list it is important to keep your focus on the positive. For example, instead of thinking that you don't have the job you really want, focus on the fact that you have a job. If you don't think that is something to be grateful for then try thinking of all the people right now who are unable to find work of any kind. Once you have your list, post it where you can see it and read it every single day. Really think about each item on the list and how lucky you are to have those things going for you and how that makes you feel. It will begin to change your outlook and help you to feel more fulfilled right now. Being grateful doesn't mean you can't make changes Being grateful doesn't mean you can't make changes. In fact, feeling more fulfilled allows you to focus on what you can achieve rather than what you haven't. When you feel more positive about your life you have the ability to move forward and to achieve more than you ever thought possible. What is even more important is that you will enjoy each step you take towards even more success.

POSITIVE THINKING IS NECESSARY FOR ALL

You must have come across it at more than one time or the other that the direction of your life is greatly dictated by your thoughts. Whether propelling you backwards or forwards, it is all due to what is in your mind. The point here therefore is that if you have been moving backwards, it is time for you to identify the negative thoughts that you have and get rid of them as soon as possible.

The best way to capitalize on the power of positive thinking is to try and find the good in everything around you even if the situation is pretty bad.

For instance, when you are in an annoying situation, instead of getting frustrated focus on some positive things around you that will keep you well composed. Take a look at getting stuck in traffic for example, this could be a chance for you to get some work done without even knowing it.

If you are a car salesman for example you will notice what classes of cars are most preferred in your region just by doing a small count.

The next tip that you will always have to carry around with you is that you should never stop smiling no matter what kind of situation you may be in. This will make sure that you don't fall into extremely low spirits and take everyone around you down with you.

There are a myriad ways to make the worst of days turn into the best of them and all that you have to do is focus on positive thoughts only.

There is so much media out there speaking to you about mind control but this will never be of any use if you never put what you hear into practice..

Everybody's destiny is in their own hands and the only way to shape it is through the power of positive thinking.

COIN POSITIVE THOUGHT FOR SUCCESS

You must have read in one place or the other that what you think is what you are and that is the direction that you will go in your life. If you want to go forward then it is what is in your mind that will determine how far, this applies for going backwards as well.

If you want a good life therefore the only way forward is to stay focused on the positive aspects of everything that comes into your life instead of thinking negatively about everything. This may be a little bit hard at first but in the long run it will be worth your while.

Whenever you come across any of those situations that you would otherwise deem "annoying", try to find the silver lining within them. Do this for all these types of situations no matter how big or small.

You will soon come to realize that doing this will begin to become very useful in very many areas of your life.

Only finding the positive things in these tough situations is not the only thing that you will have to do. You will also have to learn how to keep a smile on your face no matter how bleak the situation may be. Not only will this be good for your spirits but you will also come to see that when you smile at the world it smiles back at you.

Of all the ways you can use to turn a bad day into a good one, the best of them is all in your mind and how you perceive everything.

There are so many sources of positive ways to improve your thinking or mind control but they are all useless if you do not apply even one.

Anybody can take up the reigns of their life and live a positive life and the only way they can start this is by beginning with one simple positive thought.

IT'S NOT IMMATURITY BUT SHYNESS

Shyness is a natural part of growing up and attaining maturity. As a kid you probably had a couple of bouts of shyness, when you went to the new school, for instance or when you were the newest kid on the block. However, you are supposed to overcome this phase in life, maybe not totally, but at least appreciably. Therefore, it becomes a matter of grave concern when you find you larynx jammed when taking that hot girl out for a dinner or date. If you find it hard making eye contact with a select group of people at this matured age, then you have probably fallen prey to the power of shyness. This article will seek to address the anomaly; and you should apply the tips mentioned here to cure your shyness. Evaluate yourself: Look inwards. Make a list of the things in your life that are precursors to your episodic shyness. These are qualities, physical or emotional, that often predispose you to shyness, for example. An effective way to overcome shyness will be to acknowledge these weaknesses, and try to substitute them with stronger points on your person. The idea is that if you are able to eliminate these weaknesses, then you will be left with the strengths, and your shyness will have no choice but to dissipate. Approach that stranger: The easiest and most convenient way to build up your confidence level and cure that shyness is to make some small talk with people you will no doubt come across in your day to day life. Learning to say the occasional "hello" and "thank you". How has been your day?" will work little wonders in your confidence. With time, these will become little conversations you will be able to endure, and from there, you can go on and on� Let people do the talking: ask more questions: In this case, you can effectively overcome shyness by making the people talk on and on. The key to this is to ask questions that do not allow for the monosyllabic answers. Keep your buddies talking by chipping in short, well-timed phrases as "really? Please you've got to explain that!" "I would like you to elaborate on that, please" most people naturally love talking about themselves, and it shouldn't be hard for you to set them off. The reason why this tip is a winner is that it takes the focus off you - the shy person - and onto the person you are talking to. That way, you do not have to squirm under the scrutiny of your partners. Although your shyness will definitely not evaporate overnight, with time, you will find that your confidence will get bigger and bigger until you have enough to take on the world. It should, of course start small. Make a little change in your speech pattern here, your walk there and you will begin to find out that you are more comfortable around people. With that you will find yourself being more of a fun person, and ultimately, your shyness would have receded.

LEARN TO PLAN AHEAD OF TIME

Have you noticed how people around are struggling to express something related to emotional weirdness? Have you tried to attend a relaxation class and noticed, happily, that you were not the only one feeling new sensations and the pressure? Then this is for you. There is a new world up there, about to unfold have you heard about it?

In this new world, there will be no ego, no weirdness, no greediness, no tensions. So they say. So we can say also. What will then be the principles of life if all those rooted values shift to a whole new bunch? The answer is called ascension. Not like Jesus on a cross, or like martyrs, in fire, rather ascension towards the light, reconnect to your essence and see the love inside of yourself and not outside! Compassion, love and unconditional movements of joy and happiness. Live in the present in the her and now and in the present is more than ever the key to live by 2012 and beyond. Simply because the past will be destroyed. Remain fluid, loving and easy, flexible and let it go before anything else. Do not hold because the more you hold the more you resist the more yo will suffer. Why would 2012 be like that when all seems to be fine to most of the people on the other side? Values of money, success and achievements will shift. For the moment it all seems to be fine when actually the shift is already there. But rather than seeing the shift as a business opportunity and reproduce the same values. consider the shift as an opportunity for growth.

Well yes if 2009 seemed to be meaning that confrontational attitude towards duality should end, then 2010 is about implementing the lesson in daily life. Human life on earth has abused time and wasted it to focus on external values. Now is the time to enter the real path of human essence. The third dimension is already too wasted it is now time to enter the fourth and fifth dimension. This is why 2010 will be an important landmark year for the advancement of each and every one of us because we will find out that there are many versions of ourselves that will co-habit in daily life. To live in a multi-dimensional world is not something about day-dreaming or just have a dream life at night and an awaken life during the day. It is about playing with time and dimensions and live in synchronicity of time, events, reality, awareness, consciousness and not being able or better not needing to segment between reality and dream. Just live and let live.

STILL YOU CAN

Listen and think about this and answer the questions that arise in this passage. Do you run into people during your daily travels that seem to always use the word can't? Does it seem as if they are unable to accomplish tasks in their life because they use the word can't before each action? I have been thinking a lot lately about this and how to engage others in what is more than a marathon. This running/triathlon/endurance sport idea is more than just a race or distance. It is a lifestyle. Changing people's lives is not easy especially when they are 'set' in their ways.

Type A people think that we just go forward and it can be done....anything can be done. Most people don't think that way though. They need to be led and shown why it is good for them. The question I keep coming back to is how do you show them? I am running a campaign on facebook that is targeted toward our main group here in the North Dallas area. I have posted on LinkedIn and Twitter about the program and because I am convinced that it can be done I want others to be convinced but does it happen that fast? See an ad for running a marathon, click on it and join? Obviously not. Marketing experts will tell you it takes 7 points of touch before somebody takes an action. So I will keep doing what I am doing in sending out press releases, Facebook ad campaigns, LinkedIn, etc to get to those 7 points but how do you get the message across that this lifestyle is FUN.

I love to race and being competitive is in my blood. I love to train and exercise. I love the choices I get to make regarding my diet on a daily basis. It is 'easy' for me to choose a spinach salad over a penne vodka dish. I used to think that the waiters or waitresses would think to themselves what is this guy ordering, but then I thought to myself that is their issue and not mine. The problem with that thought process is that those are the exact people I want to work with and help. Help them make healthier choices, but doing so could take all day because of how passionate I am about living a healthy lifestyle. The one issue I face is that it is not just running, but it involves so much more. There is the exercise and diet but also the rest and recovery. Endurance sports typically leads to an all around healthier life and not just physically.

I hear all the time from family and friends that I can't do that. I can't run a mile or my favorite the only 13.1 miles I'm covering is in my car. We have all heard it before and for me it is somewhat maddening. I started running by doing a 1/4 mile walk, then 1/4 mile jog, then 1/4 mile walk, then 1/4 mile jog and be done. 15 minutes give or take for a week like that. Then I moved up to another distance....2 miles. And it kept growing but I didn't come into this world running a marathon. For me the word can't is a total conversation ender. Once you use that word then it doesn't matter why because you have shut down. My step son says I can't carry this or I can't carry that. I tell him fine leave it on the floor then and somebody who can will pick it up and carry it. I want to get him out of the mindset before it even starts.

I don't look at the world as a world of not possible. I see the world in a way that leads me to believe that anything is possible. It is a positive mindset that I have chosen and feel it benefits me. If something truly cannot be done then it had better be because I tried and tried and tried and was unsuccessful, and not because I just looked at the project as too daunting.

When I was in Mississippi a few weeks ago, we did some video shooting for the website about what running, marathons and Marathon Makeover mean to us. My story is not unlike a lot of folks out there who got started in endurance sports and have let it carry them forward. Each person in the interview described how there was a trigger. A bad relationship, poor eating decisions or a number of other queues but in the end it was something that made them move. You cannot force a person to move and they have to choose to move on their own but once that decision is made the phrase cannot must be removed from your vocabulary. You are now a doer and doers ignore cannot signs.

Running and training for a marathon or half-ironman or ironman is fun. You can see changes in your personality, changes in your work product, changes in your family and friends as they catch the bug from you. You become an inspiration to others and will help them become a more well-rounded person leading a well balanced life.

Tell them it's possible and they just need to change their mind for this one obstacle. Once they see that they can do it they will think to themselves is there anything I could not accomplish and now can. It is amazing to see the mindset of a person change.

Change is difficult but this is one that we can all make. You will be better for it in the long run. It won't be easy but once you set that goal and achieve it all other things will fall into place and the term can't or word cannot will no longer be in your vocabulary.

IT IS NOT EASY BUT YOU HAVE TO FORGIVE

How many of you greet the day with a positive outlook? Lets see a show of hands......wow, not very many, huh? That is not really much of a surprise.

Most of us have a tendency to wake up, feeling like you didn't have enough sleep, the day is gray and overcast, maybe we have a ton of things to do and we don't look forward to it. Sound familiar? I know it used to for me.

Years ago, I did not have any knowledge of positive thinking...no clue. I would bitch, moan and complain about just about everything. How do you think people around me felt? "Oh god, there's Dan, the ultimate griper". Talk about someone you really didn't want to be around much...:).

When I was injured in a work accident in 1978 and was in the hospital, a nurse told me I needed to think about positive things and not to worry, it would help me through my physical therapy and I would get better, faster.

I wanted to believe her, so I made up my mind that I was going to look at things in a fresh, new way. That was my first experience with the power of the mind.

I set out to be the best patient and I had a goal; to get back on my feet again, to walk, to go water skiing again. I worked hard, went to the gym, sweated and refused to believe that I would never walk.

One year to the month of my injury, two friends of mine took me on a boat to go water skiing. I got out on two skis and dropped one and started to slalom. Can you imagine how I felt? I was elated! I had done it.

I started a job in marketing and sales and over time, started to go to little seminars to improve my sales output. Most everything that I encountered was dealing with the mind and how it can make us a positive and more valuable person to the company.

I started to realize that I could take this new found knowledge and use it to my advantage throughout all phases of my life. People would enjoy my friendship, because I had a positive impact on them. More often than not, I was experiencing joy, great relationships, better results in my career and more opportunities that came my way. I was given awards and recognized among my peers.

This has also compounded my achievements as a disabled athlete, making me work harder and have greater expectations in what I wanted to accomplish. I looked at everything in a positive light and even if I failed, or couldn't do something right, I would ALWAYS look ahead and knew that I could do it. I just knew it.

You can do yourself a favor by looking into this simple, yet very powerful way to change your own life. Read as much as you can about visualization, the power of thinking positive and how to re-arrange your thought processes. It can change your perspective on everything and help you be successful in your relationships and your career.

When you are trying to work at home, making income online, this new found awareness will be a great attribute to be a successful Internet marketer and will help you to be a affiliate marketing powerhouse.

START YOUR DAY WITH POSITIVE THOUGHTS

Having daily positive thoughts is so important; maintaining a positive attitude during the day isn't easy, especially if you come from a negative mindset. Sometimes you'll wakeup in really positive moods, sometimes not so much; the only way to guarantee that you'll stay positive is self indulging positive thoughts.

So how do you do this? I used wake up to the song "All Star" by Smash Mouth, it seems really cheesy, but it would wake me up on a positive note. Later on I got to hate it because I get to hate all my alarm clock sounds.:P

But that's pretty much the way to do it, start the day with your daily positive thoughts. That song hits the nail with what positivity is, indulging in shameless self promotion and motivation. So I thought why not tell myself the things that keep me motivated?

And this is how the idea of a list of affirmations was born, I read about it on several sites and to be honest, I thought it was kind of ridiculous but still seemed kind of logical.

If you tell yourself something repeatedly you'll start believing it; people tend to do this with negative thoughts and it ends up working. So why not use it in a positive way?

The way this works is you tell yourself positive thoughts that will motivate you. They don't necessarily have to be true, for example, telling yourself "I am confident" could be one. Even if you don't consider yourself to be confident it is motivating and will help you start thinking that way.

Work on building your own list, especially in the initial stages of wanting to improve your social aspect it really helps you make that mind shift.

So I'll share my personal daily positive thoughts list so you can try making your own:

• I am that guy that talks to everyone and shows that big air of core confidence and a really unique sense of humor in a really witty sort of way.
• I have that really comfortable air around me and everyone enjoys talking to me.
• I command respect and leadership.
• I am really cool.
• I have a big social circle and a bunch of close friends who I do stuff with.
• I have attractive girls from all over my social circle and most are interested in me.
• I seem to always be surrounded by attractive females.
• I have the funniest stories to tell and I'm a great storyteller.
• I have the funniest and coolest things happen to me.
• I have an active lifestyle and I'm in all the cool things to do.

Those thoughts are motivating because they made me picture who I wanted to be, even though I don't use an "affirmation list" anymore, these were daily positive thoughts that really stuck.

I just dug up that list from some old files and I'm just noticing that many of those positive thoughts are now realities.

Like I said before it is extremely helpful in the early stages, so try it, it's positive propaganda for your mind. Make your own personal list of daily positive thoughtsand write them down, read them occasionally during the day for a while, add positivism to your life!

UNDERSTANDING AND DEALING WITH DEPRESSION

The reason a majority of us suffer from depression in the first place is due to the fact that we are not able to pick up on certain depression symptoms. Picking up on depression symptoms early on can help an individual work on their problems at an early stage. Getting rid of any medical problem when it is in its early stages is much easier than trying to deal with it once it gets serious. For this reason, there has been a lot of urgency to spread the word on some of the most common symptoms that an individual may suffer from if they are experiencing depression. With a recent medical researching showing that nearly 87% of the world population is known to suffer from some form of depression, such knowledge would be useful to the majority. One of the most common depression symptoms that many are known to suffer from is feeling helpless. Feeling helpless is quite common due to the life styles that we have chosen to live in today. You might find your self feeling as though it is the end of the world and that a particular situation could only get worse. Even though you might think that this is an odd feeling to go through from time to time, in actual fact it is has been known to fall under the depression symptoms category. Other depression symptoms are known to include a lost of interest in happiness and enjoyment. In such cases, a person is known to lose interest in former hobbies, sports, past times and social activities. In some extreme cases, individuals are also known to lose an interest in sex. This is seen as another popular symptom that many go through without realizing. Experiencing a change in body weight of 5% either way is known to be classified as depression symptoms. Sudden weight loss or weight gain of 5% in a period of one month is seen to be hinting towards suffering from depression unless you are suffering from some other medical problem. In such a case it is advised to contact your local GP immediately. Having irregular patterns of sleep is also seen to fall under depression symptoms. Irregular patterns of sleep can consist of over sleeping, waking up in the early hours or having trouble sleeping altogether. All are classed as being depression symptoms, which one should take seriously. Suffering from an occasional irregular pattern of sleep is normal. However, suffering from the problem on a regular basis is when you should think about visiting your local GP. There are many other depression symptoms that a person can suffer from as well. The depression symptoms mentioned above are some of the most common and unnoticed symptoms that are known to lead onto serious concerns. Spotting these symptoms in their early stages and acting accordingly can really help prevent a person suffering from long term depression. If you suffer from any of the above on a regular basis, make sure you consult a doctor.
Even though it may not be apparent, a majority of us are known to suffer from depression. A recent medical research showed that over 87.19% of the world population is known to suffer from some form of depression. Many feel that the only way to deal with such a problem is through prescribed medication. Even though prescribed medication has been proven to have its benefits, the side effects that it brings along with it are the main reason it is mostly avoided. There are many natural remedies that one can use which we are going to take a closer look at. One of the most important factors that are known to act as a major contributor to depression is our diet. It is highly recommended to consume a healthy diet that consists of fruits and vegetables. Proving your body with the right nutrition ensures that your level of iron and thyroid remain constantly normal. Having the right balance of nutrition on our body is known to prevent depression as it keeps the body active which in result keeps a person in a good mood. Another great way through which you can deal with depression naturally is by doing regular exercise. In this particular case, it would be advised to do as much cardio exercise as possible. Cardio exercise is known to increase the level of serotonin which is the main contributor to keeping an individual's mood happy. Doing exercise on a regular basis will reduce depression has it gets rid of anxiety and frustration that you may have built up. It is advised that you should try meeting new people as well to help reduce depression. This can be done by joining a club or group. Research has shown that the more people you have to talk to and spend time with, keeps your mind off unnecessary issues that are known to cause depression in the first place. The key with making more friends is to find people you can trust and get close to; those whom you wouldn't mind sharing things with. Meditation has always been a great way to naturally deal with depression as well. Meditation can include things such as yoga's, watching health videos were you practice specific exercise etc. All these approaches mentioned above have been proven to reduce depression naturally. What you do have to realize however is that simply sticking to one of the above options would not be sufficient. You should be aiming to have a mixture of at least or three options that have been mentioned above to see any major changes. Most of the time we feel that we are depressed over things that make us feel as though it is the end of the world. When in actual fact looking at your problem from a third person's perspective actually can make you realize that your problem is something that you can easily deal with. Any one can deal with their problems naturally by implementing a few changes in their lifestyle.

SIMPLE WAYS TO NEGATE SHYNESS

Shyness! shyness!! shyness!!!. Hmmm! Most shy people try to console themselves with words like "I'm not shy. I'm just a quiet person." How funny, because those two concepts - that of shyness and quietness - though they may seem similar, are from two different worlds. A quiet person has no problem mixing with crowds, but will only speak if they have something worth saying. Otherwise, they just shut up and listen. The shy person on the other hand, is bursting with the desire to speak, but is unable to because of the throat-clamping feeling of anxiety. It's easy to overcome shyness! All you need to do is acknowledge that you are shy, and that you want to take steps to curing the defect. Here are seven tips for you to overcome shyness: * Learn to love yourself. Appreciate that you are shy, but not retarded. Do not let the feeling that you are socially redundant because you are shy permeate into your mind. Your shyness is not a disadvantage therefore you should come to terms with it. This is the first step to banishing shyness. * Seek out your discomfort. If you do not exercise your conversational activities, you might not lose of the feeling of shyness. Another step to overcome shyness is by deliberately seeking out social events to attend. The more you subject yourself to these events, the more you are forcing your hand - it might be stressful, but eventually it would be worth it. * Don't run away from the situation. If you felt your last social conversation was a disaster and you have sworn never to have anything with it again, then you are running away from reality. I advice you instead to look at things differently and stay on course, it will definitely be worth it! * Try to calm down. The thing with shy minds is that are constantly thinking: thinking up worst-case scenarios in any discussion event. As a result, with a mind so filled up with bogeys and visions of conversation disasters, it is not surprising that you become tongue tied. Take breathing exercises and empty your mind of these thoughts instead. * Practice in mild settings: a family gathering may work the trick. Try to see how you can get along with members of the family - with whom you are more amiable - and by doing this you are building up for the grand scenario. * Imagine a situation, and imagine what you could possibly do to feel more at ease. I have discovered that mental visualization tends to work the trick. * Try to think more of others than all the ways you can mess up the situation. Listen to them and consider what they are saying. That way, you can get a hold on the conversation and you wont' have to stutter to respond to them. These skills should be practiced, and you should bear in mind that it is not an overnight thing, as it will be slow, but surely you will snap out of your shyness.

THE POWER OF SELF MEDITATION

So many people today fail the assignments of life because they can't even sit down and think and talk POSITIVELY to themselves. If you are wanting to learn to meditate, then you have come to the right place. While you can probably find an abundance of different ways to meditate, here is one simple way that doesn't cost a penny, is easy to do, and can be done by anyone. It is quite effective for not only relieving stress on a regular basis, but can also be a base for healing a number of different ailments. So if you need to relieve stress and anxiety, or want a good start to fix what ails you, then listen up. The first step is finding a nice, quiet area. This can be in a bedroom, a corner of your home or office, whatever. Now it is a good idea to have absolutely no distractions for at least twenty to thirty minutes, ten to do your deep breathing exercises, and twenty for the actual meditation. In order to get into the proper mood, you need a comfortable chair, and the lights turned down low. You can light some candles to get this mood going. You don't want to be so comfortable that you will fall asleep, just deeply relaxed. You can also play some music, but soft music is preferred, or even a CD with nature sounds, like waves crashing, or a babbling brook, something soft. Sit in your chair in a comfortable position, feet flat on the floor. Close your eyes, and breath slowly and deeply through your nose, holding it in for a few seconds once your lungs are full, then breathe out slowly through your mouth. Do this for five minutes, not really thinking about anything, letting go of the tension. There are two reasons for this. One is that breathing like this fills your body with oxygen. The second is that it forces you to pause. If you find that you open your eyes once in awhile, don't worry about it, and don't force yourself to keep your eyes closed. Open them, look around check the clock, then close your eyes again. Now, with your eyes closed, picture yourself in front of a quiet pond that has a bunch of stones or pebbles. These are the thoughts and stresses in your life. These can also represent illnesses, cancers, or what ever your problem at the time might be. One by one, remove these stones and place them aside. It is a good idea to limit the amount of stones to ten or fifteen of the most important things that you want to get rid of, so you aren't spending the whole time taking out stones. This should be about ten minutes. Now here is where you can really customize your meditative experience. For just regular meditation, you want to put stones back into the pond that associate with things that represent relaxation or good aspects of your life. Maybe you could fill it with things that you dream about wanting, that nice house, your ideal partner, etc. For healing, this is when you focus on the part of your body that is ill, or needs help healing, like a broken bone mending, getting stronger, or antibodies killing that cancer. Do this for another ten minutes. The last five minutes, use your deep breathing exercises again, and slowly bring yourself back to reality. Now don't expect a miracle, but if you do this on a regular basis, it will work.

YOU MUSTN'T SUFFER

Have you ever woken up and felt like pulling the covers back over your head because in your mind, it is already going to be a "bad day?" Or have you started your day and it seems like the moment you stepped out of your home the Karma Gods had cracked you right between the eyes and everything in that day would continue to get worse? I am sure we have all had those moments.

You know the moments where we complain for the rest of the day of all the things that didn't work out and sometimes to make it a little bit more dramatic we add in the things that happened earlier in the week or that year that didn't work out just to really plead your case as to why things suck....why life isn't fair...why your too tall, too skinny, too fat, late for work, not good enough, mad at him or her, blah blah blah blah.....The list could go on and on....and it usually does!

Were you aware that all that suffering you cause for your self is YOU causing it AND it is really optional to suffer or not? Yup! I said it! O-P-T-I-O-N-A-L!! I know where you just went...."You don't understand me" or "if you only knew!!" Nope, I don't need to know what it is that has you think suffering is all that you can do to know that you can change it in a split second!

This took something for me to learn. I had my own version of the stories of why I suffer...."I was married and divorced very young....my guidance councilor said I would never amount to anything....My sixth grade teacher never taught us science and that's why I struggled...." Do you hear your own version of this somewhere in your life?

Taking the time to stop concentrating so much on what is not or has not worked in your life and begin to look at what DOES work about your life, even the most smallest things you take for granted, can give you a whole new perspective on life and suffering.

The Webster's dictionary has one line in particular that refers to the definition of suffer: to put up with especially as inevitable or unavoidable. Why would anyone want to "put up with" or accept something negative as "inevitable or unavoidable?" That is my deep thought for the day!

Any time you are in a situation or in a thought that you are suffering for some reason, look to see what that "reason" is and shift it. Think about what would have you live that life you really want and get focused back on the positive things you have. When I am having those moments of suffering I look at "Wow! I have legs and arms, that is pretty cool! Hey, there are people out there that really love me!! I have a roof over my head!...!" Look for even the small things to snap you out of why you think you need to suffer and if you can't seem to do it on your own, there are many people in the world that could compare themselves to you and I bet they think they have it worse than you!

Geesh! Oh the Humanity of it all!

WHAT SUCCESS IS ALL ABOUT

Take a moment to go inside and see how you define success. Is your success defined by: * How much money you have? * Having a big house and an expensive car? * How expensive your clothes are? * Traveling first class on airlines? * How attractive you are? * How attractive your partner is? * How famous you are? * Winning or being the best at something? * How many beautiful people want to have sex with you? * How many friends you have? * How much attention and approval you get? Unfortunately, the media often supports defining success in many of the above ways. But are you successful just because you have a lot of money, even if you had to use others to get it? What if you made millions and others suffered as a result of your choices? What if you live in a big house and drive an expensive car but find it difficult to be loving to your partner or your children - or to yourself? What if you defined success by how much to you contribute to another or to society? What if you define success by how kind you are to yourself and to others and by what you contribute to the world? What if success is not defined by how many widgets you sell, but by how many people you help and how joyful you are? There are many people who find it easy to make money, or achieve fame but find it very difficult to be kind to themselves and to the people closest to them. There are many people who are outwardly successful yet act out in ways that are harmful to themselves and others. Bill Clinton, Tiger Woods, and OJ Simpson come to mind of people who achieved everything but never defined success and inner worth by being loving to themselves and to their families. Instead they defined success by getting sex or by whom they possessed. What if these people had defined their success and their sense of worth by how well they took loving care of themselves, how kind they were to their families, and how much they contributed to society? Would they have chosen to harm themselves and others to fill their emptiness and avoid the pain that they were causing by their own self-abandonment? Another example is Michael Jackson, who was incredibly unkind to himself, constantly distorting himself rather than learning to be kind and accepting toward himself. If he had learned to fully embrace his true Self and to define his worth and success by his ability to love rather than by his looks or approval, he might be alive today. The movie industry is riddled with stars who have everything - money, fame, looks, admiration - and who struggle with various addictions, such as alcohol, drugs, food, and sex. We see various stars on TV, constantly losing and gaining weight, or going in and out of rehab. Why are they so unhappy and empty that they keep turning to addictions? Obviously, everything they have externally does nothing to fill the void INTERNALLY. External success actually does nothing to fill the inner emptiness that leads to substance abuse, sexual addiction, and other forms of addiction, as well as to anger, blame and rage. External success is great for financial security and freedom to do whatever you want, but being a truly joyful person demands a different definition of success. What if love, kindness, generosity, caring, compassion, empathy, and understanding toward ourselves and others, and helpful contributions to society were lauded as the hallmarks of success? What if our newspapers and news channels devoted their stories to people who had learned how to truly love themselves enough to be able to extend their love out to others and contribute to the good of the planet? What if supporting our own highest good and the highest good of all was valued more than money? What if kindness - to yourself and with others - was your guiding light? The chances are that you would know, deep within your soul, that you are a huge success - that you are doing what you came to this planet to do!

SELF MOTIVATION IS VERY TANTAMOUNT TO SELF ACTUALIZATION

How to set a goal that will keep a person motivated long enough to achieve them, is a question which is often asked. A large goal can be best set in such a way that you can flexibly adopt any change that might be required later. If you set a large goal and you are not able to achieve it then you may feel dejected at the slow progress you are making. There are certain tactful methods for achieving large goals. It is important to set large goals that are challenging and which will gain you appreciation, on their achievement. But such large goals have to broken into small attainable steps which can be easily conceptualized. If you do not split your goals and continue with the set large goals, you start feeling that the goal is too daunting. Sometimes you may be going well in the beginning but may get discouraged in the due course, with the enormity of the task. Sometimes you may not be able to even define the problem at all. This is the reason why you should split your large goal into simpler steps. Whenever a problem crops up, you should not feel weighed down because this will hamper both your work and motivation. Splitting the large goal into smaller series will enable you to tackle the problems much effectively. You can create mini steps that can be easily finished off within a stipulated time period. This will let you solve all the problems that arise in the due course and finally your large goal will be successfully achieved. For example, if you are wishing to clear off your debts soon, you will have to formulate certain mini goals. You have to decide the amount you are going to set aside each month for the paying off your debt. You can then chart out the expenses you can curtail or forego. All your steps must lead to achieving the large goal you set, paying your debt. Likewise, you can also set some rewards for achieving the goals which will keep you motivated constantly. If your goal is large then you can set an overwhelming reward and vice versa. Such rewards are always motivating and encouraging. If you remain conscious of the reward that it self will act as a stimulant for your efforts you put in to achieve the goal. In case of smaller goals, mini rewards do the wonders. They keep you motivated. They encourage you to accomplish your task quickly. The reward must be directly linked to the achievement of the goals. This will further provide the required stimulation. For instance, if you are able to eat a healthy throughout the week, then you can reward yourself with the choicest food, at the end of the week. Such small rewards keeps you going without getting funk. You can go a long way and accomplish your large goals without getting daunted. Such mini goals and rewards are certainly a great approach to a large problem.

SIMPLE WAYS OF STOPPING UNNECESSARY REACTIONS

So many people are ignorant of their temperament and that is why they make heinous mistakes when they deal with people who do not belong to the same class as they. Having your first panic attack can be a very terrifying experience. Not only that, it make you confused and scared of the consequences. Since you never experience it before, you mistakenly think that you're having a heart attack and this make you even more frightened until you made a trip to your doctor and were diagnosed as having panic attack. You keep asking yourself if you can stop the panic attack and make it go away. Left with little knowledge and guidance, you just feel awful and unsure of what can be done to overcome the conditions. You think that you're going crazy and this make you really embarrassed to talk about your problem. You keep replaying the panic attack scene in your mind and feel even more depressed after that. Will this attack last forever? Bottling up your feeling is not a healthy way to approach panic attack. It will just make you more anxious. Find somebody that you can trust and let this person know how you feel about yourself. Talk to her about your problem and maybe she can help you with your situation. Sometimes, all you need to do is �ask'. Your friends and family will be happy to help you through this difficult time. If you have access to internet connection at home, then use this opportunity to familiarize yourself with your conditions. You can use the net to search for symptoms of panic attacks and its causes and effects. You can also search for information related to various treatments available for panic attack and discuss about it with your doctor. By doing some early research, you'll be more prepared to talk about your problem and will have better opportunity to ask the �right questions' during your sessions. If you spend more times searching for this information, you'll realize that there are even sites covering how you can use natural healing to overcome your panic attack. This additional information might useful for you, so keep an eye for it. Occupy yourself with these activities so that you've better understanding about your problem. Have a small notebook handy and jot down useful information that you find online. Just remember not to think too much about your panic attack as it can lead you to have more attack. You should stop doing this because you're actually damaging and corrupting your mind with negative thought. You shouldn't allow yourself to be engulfed in this worry or you'll be drowned in it. Focus your energy on more positive things and try not to worry about small stuffs. Keep yourself buzzing with activities with your friends and family. Sometimes you can also join support group in your area or even participate in anxiety forum online. You'll be amazed at the wealth of information that you can find in these forums and you can learn a thing or two on how others cope with their problem. Adopt positive attitude in life and keep yourself busy. Make some good changes in your life and promise yourself that you'll fight your panic attack till it goes away.